The Loud House: Author in story
by Sturmtrooper
Summary: Title says MOST of it. All references and cameos belong to their respective owners. Also, no flames please, and any ideas for chapters will be much appreciated. Thank you. Now enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

In the basement of the Loud House, there is an extra room. It wasn't used for much, but it became the bedroom of an unexpected guest.

That guest is me. Now some of you might be wondering, how did I get here? Not going to tell, except that for some reason I am dressed like a Nazi officer from Wolfenstien minues the hat, plus a Trench coat. I have brown, black hair, green eyes and healthy white skin, I'm also a man.

But enough about me. Currently I was busy sorting out my new room when I received a radio call from Lincoln, telling me to come to his room. So I climbed two sets of stairs and walked into his room and sat down.

"Ok Storm, I need your help." He began. I forgot to mention, I go by Stormtrooper. "I need your help to distract my siblings. I could do it by myself but I don't think they'll fall for the same tricks twice."

"What are you planning?" I inquired.

He looked serious. "I'm going to watch Enemy at the Gates. Clyde recommended it to me, he says it's a good movie."

Enemy at the Gates? "I'm in. Leave Lucy, Lynn, Lisa and the Twins to me." Yeesh, try saying that ten times. We commenced Operation Stalingrad immediately (I am not letting Lincoln name it). The first room on the left had Lisa in it. She was busy finishing up her machine that can change the genetic structure of anything. Like hell I will let her use it.

"Hey Lisa." I said, walking into the room. "You know the Russians are building a rocket that relies only on oxygen right?"

She turned to me with an angry stare. "I will not be bested by a Russian!" she then proceeded to run down the stairs and into the backyard to build an impossible rocket, leaving a trail of fire in her wake. What's with her and Russians, I will never know.

Next is the twins. I walked across the hallway and saw them squabbling on what to watch. "Hey you two!" they stopped and turned to me. "Listen, and listen closely, I have reason to believe that your parents hid some of your stuff in the attic." At first they looked at me as though I grew a second head. Then they ran out, got the attic ladder down, and began to search. Gullible pair, those two. As if I'd bother telling them that.

Next up is Lynn, and in my opinion, she is the easiest one to distract. I grabbed a pair of roller skates, taped some rockets to them and I had myself a distraction. I walked up to the athlete and presented the gifts. "I believe that you'll find these for the most extreme-" I didn't even finish before I heard the sound of her outside and found myself grasping nothing but thin air. Told you, easiest to distract.

Lucy, well, she is the boss of this little game, so it will be a challenge. But to my luck, she was busy conducting a séance which left me free to head downstairs. I met Lincoln in the hallway and we proceeded downstairs. As we walked I could see the others distracted, man they are too easy.

But when we reached the bottom, the Loud Sisters were already there, watching a movie! "How did you guys get down here before us?" I asked.

"I used clones that will melt into a gelatinous compound after four hours, three if they are exposed to extreme conditions of electrical potential." Explained Lisa.

Ok this wasn't impossible to translate but I decided to fight fire with fire. "Lincoln, wissen Sie schon Deutsch?" I asked the white haired boy in German. _Do you still know German_? (Yeah, I taught him German.)

His sisters looked at me confused as he replied. "Ja, ichverstehe." _Yes I understand_

"Gut, weil ich sie nicht verstehen. Denken Sie, dass Sie zweimal den gleichen Trick ziehen?" _Good, because I don't understand them. Do you think they might pull the same trick twice?_

"Vielleicht" _Maybe_

"Why are you speaking German?" asked Lola. "Never mind, do you girls remember when Leni taught us Hawaiian?"

Lori then responded with an "Aemakou e hana!" _Yes we do!_

Lola nodded her head in approval. " ʻo, uapiʻiakuaiikekahimea?" _Excellent. Do you think they are up to something?_

"It Kahiki" said Lynn. _It's possible_

Where did I see this before? It doesn't matter. "Stop it."

"Not until you stop." said Lisa.

"Können Sie verstehen Sie?" I asked Lincoln. _Do you understand them_?

He merely shook his head "Nein." _No_.

"Verdammt!" I cursed. "Wait, why didn't I think of this before? We could just watch our movie on my computer."

After a quick moment of face palming at our stupidity, we headed downstairs into the basement. Now my room, AKA "That room next to the laundry room which houses a Hobo" (Lori named it after I broke her phone), is a regular room with a bed, a desk with a lamp, Batman figurine and a laptop and a small window at the top. So it's not much, but you're in for a surprise.

"Ok, so we just go onto the site." Lincoln said before I stopped him when he reached for my laptop.

"Not on that puny screen." I then proceeded to flip back the head of the Batman figurine, revealing a red button which I pushed. Then a panel slid out from the centre of the floor, opening a staircase which we descended. After I entered, the door closed and lights lit up, leading us into a high tech room, filled with machines of all kind. Hey, I did say I was dressed as a Nazi officer from Wolfenstien. So naturally, I got the primal urge to build these things.

There were rockets that could be used for Emergency Evac, giant metal dogs, a few machines that does things to people, a few advanced weaponry and army outfits. There were also some chemicals and a whole lot more but our primary focus was on a huge, 90 inch plasma screen TV that hung in the centre of the 'Lobby'. We sat down and I put the movie on. We watched and at the end we were interrupted by a message appearing on the screen.

"Looks like my cameras just finished installing and updating." I said.

"Cameras?" asked the white haired boy.

I grinned. "Yeah, I installed them to learn valuable secrets of your family. You know, like crushes."

"Can we watch? I've been dying to get my hands on some dirt." Well I couldn't say no now could I? We both wanted to get a little leverage should we need their help and they are unwilling to contribute. So I switched to the cameras and I saw Lori and Leni in their rooms, just chilling. Lori was Skyping her boyfriend, Bobby, and Leni was sketching designs for her clothes. When the Skype ended, they sighed in exhaustion much to our surprise.

"Thank goodness, I'm not sure if I could've kept that up." Said Leni. "Bobby would have told Ronnie Anne who tell Lincoln, and I'm not sure if he's ready for the acknowledgement of having a scientific genius much smarter than Lisa as a sister."

She promptly pulled out a blackboard which had mathematical equations only Einstein could solve. Lori meanwhile took out a D&D Strategy BOOK! The two continued to do their… Secret activities I guess… whilst we were watching. Me and Lincoln looked at each other and we changed the cameras. The rest of them were boring, except for one. Who would have thought that Lana the Tomboy had a Princess Teddy named Princess Rose?

"Lincoln? What do you think we should do with this evidence?" I asked my friend. "Because the way I see it, we have two options. One, we show everyone using the TV or Two, we use this to our advantage."

"Well, they would kill us either way, but we would be helping them with the first one. Show them they have nothing to hide. Especially from you." He replied. I have to admit, he made a valid reason. Here's to hoping that I don't die.

* * *

Ok, so Lori just came downstairs and joined her sisters on the couch. I gulped, and I could see sweat form on Lincoln's forehead. This is going a lot harder than I had originally thought. But regardless, we passed the point of no return when we called them down here.

"Ok, you know how me and Lincoln went to watch our movie on my computer? Well, and don't kill us, we watched you guys on my surveillance cameras afterwards and we found out some secrets." I saw them fidget as if I was talking about each of them. "Now me and your brother decided to help you with some of these as it would be beneficial. Of course we plan to show you the evidence as solid proof that there is no need to hide anything from family and a guy who can now monitor everything you do."

I switched the TV on and the three siblings in question were horror-struck as their deepest secrets were displayed for all to see. A good minute passed, and the screen was thrown through the window by Leni. "There was no need for that. In fact it just confirms what everyone just saw."

Everyone turned to Lori, Leni and Lana and they did the most unexpected thing: They gave them a hug. Truth be told, I was hoping that there'd be anger or sadness, because I had this whole speech planned out… come to think of it, this is the best option.

"Thank goodness I'm not the only one in this establishment that has the cranium capacity to understand the basis of quantum physics." Said Lisa.

We, minus Leni, just stared. "I'm not the only smart one."

* * *

Well it's been a half hour and they each told each other some embarrassing secrets of their own. Not that I'm going to tell. Besides, I'm too busy trying to get out of this rope, made from my cameras, which the Loud Sisters put me in.


	2. Chapter 2

OK, I'll admit. It might not have been a rational thing to do when I installed those cameras. Especially in a house with ten females (not including Mrs Loud). So to make up to them, I let them into my lab. Don't even say that phrase otherwise something will go wrong! Anyway, they were astounded by everything. From the prototype PanzerHunds to the miniature fusion reactor that powers 25% of the lab, despite being only five centimetres in length. They loved it, especially those two nerd birds.

Of course, the real challenge was keeping them well away from most of the stuff that I deemed 'DANGEROUS DO NOT TOUCH!'

Oh, don't think it's that dangerous uh. Well, imagine if Lucy found the molecular reorganiser! It's bad enough that she is creepy, BUT I DON'T need her to be part vampire bat! If Lana found those combat suits then I would have to pay for all SEVENTY of the house repair bills. And don't get me started with Lisa and those dangerous chemicals that are government access only.

To sum it up, I regret my choice.

"Hey Storm!" Shouted Lincoln. "What does this do?"

I turned and saw him next to a machine that looked like a colander mixed with a blender. "That is a mental translator. It basically does stuff involving you mind, including seeing memories from before you were barely a year old, like as though they were made yesterday."

"Sweet! Can I use it?" He asked.

"Sure. Let me – Luna! Those are not made for music! Those amplifiers will annihilate our ears!" The girl put down the guitar. I had enough! "Everyone come here!"

After following my command, they were standing in front of me and their brother. "Ok, Lincoln will be the last one to use anything in here! Because frankly, you guys are untrustworthy around here." I scolded. "If you want something in here, then behave! If something goes wrong in here, it could potentially vaporise this half of the globe!"

They looked ashamed and nodded their heads in understanding. Wow, when it comes to destruction they know when to quit. Looks like I owe Clyde five dollars. Anyway I put the device onto the white hair of my friend and powered it on. I might have forgotten to mention that it will hurt a bit, but just a zap. Besides, it's not like those girls would panic.

After a minute, a picture loaded onto the big screen. It was me yelling at Luna a couple of minutes ago. "Ok Linc, how far back?" I asked.

"The day I was born." He replied.

I pressed a few buttons and it came up with him being cradled in his mother's arms, though we did a double take at the white haired girl next to him. A nurse came and took the baby, after she left another nurse came. A moment later, everyone panicked. Saying something about the first nurse being fake. All I know is, I am going to do some interrogating with the Louds.

* * *

Mr and Mrs Loud were watching a movie when we came, kidnapped and tied them to the dining chairs, in the basement, in the dark, with only one light. I know, cliché. Anyway, Lori got to interrogation pretty quickly. "OK, tell us what you know of Lincoln's twin!" Sheesh, she is deadly serious about this one.

"What are you talking about?" If looks could kill, then Mrs Loud would be dead ten times over from the glare her oldest is giving her.

"All right then. Either you tell us or Storm will burn all your cherished possessions!" Another light came on that showed me holding a flamethrower and Mr Loud's trophies and Mrs Loud's baby photo albums. Don't ask where I got the license for a flamethrower, because I don't have one.

At sight of their belongings at threat from a pyromaniac (what would YOU call a guy about to burn all you hold dear?) they instantly spilled the beans. "All right! Lincoln had a twin sister named Lulu. But she got kidnapped in the hour they were born. We tried to find her, even had 12,000 dollars paid to go as far as the other end of the country. But we never found her."

Then mood was solemn and depressed. Everyone, especially Lincoln, had tears forming at their eyes. Of course, I had to break it. "So that explains the white haired girl living in the back alleyway of KCF that looks remarkably like Lincoln."

At this they glared at me and a few minutes later, I was the one who was tied up. Of course they came back and untied me so I could show them where. There were about twenty KFC's in this town and time is of the essence. Mostly because they wanted to see their long lost family member.

* * *

We came to the spot I mentioned and we saw this white haired girl with freckles, big buck teeth like Lincoln's, an orange shirt and blue skirt. She also wore some sandals. She looked a lot like Lincoln. If he was a girl, and his clothes were tattered and unwashed. At first she did not notice us, but upon hearing our footsteps she immediately looked up. She was scared that such a large crowed had congregated near her, but I couldn't help but notice that every time her eyes fell onto Lincoln, she instantly went from scared to curious.

Lisa and Leni caught on as well, as I saw them looking between to two white heads. I nudged Lincoln and gestured silently with my head to the girl. He caught on what I meant. Slowly, he crept closer to her, lowering himself as he went as to not startle the fragile looking girl.

"Hi." He started. "I'm Lincoln."

She spoke in a female-version-of-Lincoln kind of way. "Why do you look like me?"

He seemed to get that awkward face right away. The kind that you get from trying to think of an easy way to put things. But he couldn't and opted for the straight answer. "Well, you see… I'm… your twin." He got a teary hug in response. She cried for a full hour, around half of it whilst in the car as we took her home. We introduced each sibling to her and, despite how shy she was earlier and whatever traumatic experience she gained from living off the streets, she warmed up to them quickly. Lori and Leni made a quick trip to the mall to buy clothes for her, though she insisted she have the same attire she was wearing. Lana and Lola played with her a bit, Lisa examined her health, Lynn and Lucy watched a Twilight movie –cringe – with her. I really hate that series.

Back on track, Luna and Luan made her livelier and do I really need to say anything about Lily. Lincoln, unfortunately for him, has to bunk with her as per her request. He's not uncomfortable sharing, he's just not used to having a permanent female occupant in his room. Though speaking of the two where are they?

A minute later, I found them, in my lab playing on a virtual simulator, blasting away at aliens. Those two really are twins.

"Alright, operation 'blast away at aliens, beat the high score and win the game and come up with a shorter name for this operation' is a go" said Lulu. Yep, definitely twins.


	3. Chapter 3

All was quiet, nobody was outside, and the only noise came from the sprinklers and birds. It was the perfect day to just chill. Unless you're me right now. The silence was broken as me and Lulu charged out the house, a tin of cookies in my arms. Behind me was Lincoln, but his pupils were surrounded by red irises, his teeth razor sharp and he had a maniac grin to his face.

"GIVE ME THE COOKIES!" He bellowed. In case you're wondering, Mrs Loud had baked some cookies for dessert and charged me and Lulu to keep it from the other Loud siblings. They go dingbat crazy over them, even Lisa and Lucy. Right now, we're trying to lose Lincoln. Which is easier said than done when he has the endurance of a psychopath. Talk about the strength of the insane.

We ducked and weaved our way through back gardens, doubling back when we lost him so as to confuse him. Fortunately, this worked and we were Lincoln free. But we most probably had the rest searching for us and these cookies. So the question remained: Where to hide them. A minute later, it came to me. We could hide out in the Santiago's house, if they found us, Lori and Lincoln would most likely defend their boy/girlfriend. But we had to move quickly.

We got there and knocked furiously, and were answered by Ronnie Anne. Before she could say anything, we stormed inside, closing the door behind us. "Ronnie, you got to help us!" I cried.

"Why is Lincoln a girl?" she asked. Oh, right. We forgot to introduce Lulu to her.

"Actually I'm his long lost twin, Lulu." The two girls exchanged pleasantries, until Bobby walked in.

At sight of the tin, he freaked. "Mrs Loud's cookies? In my home? Have you two gone nuts?"

"Bobby, we need you and your sister to hide us." I told him.

He just shook his head. "It's no use Storm. Mrs Loud gave me those cookies to keep them away from the Loud's, and hoped that Lori wouldn't hurt me." He took out his phone and showed us a picture of Lori, in a similar state to Lincoln, tackling him. "Sadly, she would do anything for those cookies."

Well so much for that plan. But then I got an idea. "Ronnie, can you take these cookies to the attic in the Loud house. Me and Lulu will run around, hopefully drawing the rest to us." Before she could say something, I shoved the treats into her arms. After that, me and the white haired girl dashed out and acted like the tin was with us. After a full half hour, we rendezvous with Ronnie in the LH attic.

"Strange, we didn't see them." Lulu pointed out ask I took the tin back. A moment later, I felt something drip on me, then again. I looked up and saw a pair of red eyes of a certain rock fanatic.

"GIVE ME THE SWEETNESS!" Luna screeched.

She jumped at us but I threw a creepy electric Santa into her. But she tore it a new one. "Santa isn't getting cookies this year. I AM!"

The three of us made a beeline for downstairs and cleverly dodged a trap made by Luan, who got caught up in it when Luna tried to follow us but crashed into both Luan and the trap.

We got outside. "That was too close for comfort." I panted.

"Tell me about it." Ronnie agreed. We cringed at the sound of a motor turning on, and I half expected Lola and her little pink car. But I was surprised to see a red eyed, sharp teethed Lily on a motor bike, wearing a pike helmet which had an Iron Cross painted on it. Oh the irony.

"Verdammt." I said before we ran for it. Thankfully Lily's tiny legs couldn't reach the peddles. But before we knew it, we had Vanzilla chasing us, with all Eleven Louds, red eyed and sharp teethed with maniac grins.

Ronnie, Lulu and I took shortcuts to other streets but somehow, Vanzilla managed to follow us or get there before us. I'm pretty sure by now we're a good hour's drive from LH. Then I saw the mall, we could get lost in there and hopefully, they too. We ran in, followed by the other Loud siblings. We managed to lose Luna in the music store, Laun in the Comedy Lounge, Lisa in the electric store, Lynn and Lana in the sport store, Leni and Lori in the clothes store, Lincoln in the comics store, Lucy in the dark fiction section of the book store, Lola in the girl section of the toy store and Lily in the baby section of the toy store. Thinking we distracted them, since we're too scared to check, we snuck out.

"What is wrong with your family?" I asked Lulu when we got out.

"Hey I just met them two weeks ago!" She retaliated.

After an hour and a half of walking, we saw the Loud House in sight, and it's close to dinner time too. Suddenly, the ground began shaking, and a robot that seems to be made from Vanzilla came up the road, and guess who was piloting the monster? That's right, the Loud siblings.

"We tried to be reasonable Storm." Shouted Lisa.

"No you haven't" I pointed out.

"Oh, right. NOW HAND THEM OVER!" and so the Louds chased us.

Then it came to me. "Ronnie, this is our fight, me and Lulu will handle this." The girl ran home. "Lulu, help your parents set up dinner, I'm going to help build up an appetite."

And that's how I found myself being chased by a robot through multiple backyards. Then my watch beeped six, it was dinner time. Changing direction, I ran right to the house, in through the door and set the cookies on the kitchen counter. I was scared out of my wits when I turned around and saw all eleven pursuers behind me.

"Kids, dinner's ready." Saved by the bell.

All eleven of them turned back to normal and went to eat. After we ate, dessert was brought out, and whilst me, Lulu, Mr and Mrs Loud each had one, the rest tore through ten cookies each like a pack of animals. This is one crazy family – and a cookie landed on my head.

"Wait – no – please! Arrgg! Not my arm! Lola please stop biting my leg – GAH!"


	4. Chapter 4

Behold!" I shouted. "The Mark 7 family space shuttle."

It looked like a jet, mixed with a caravan and a one story house. This puppy was the crème de la crème of my inventions, and the Loud sisters proved it so at their awe struck faces.

"Though I can't take all the credit," I added humbly. "Lincoln helped me get, and put together, the parts that were needed. Like the all important Military Grade Computer System and Rocket Fuel."

I patted the kid's back as he stood next to me. But Leni had a curious look in her eye. "Where do you get stuff like that? I mean, it's not commercially sold."

Me and Lincoln had a cover story for that. "I have some connections in the military, but they're nothing bad I promise you."

(Meanwhile, at a certain military base.)

A young private was busy checking the stocks in inventory when he saw that some rocket fuel was missing. "Sir! It happened again! We had some Rocket fuel stolen."

A General in his mid-fifties came and grabbed the sandwich that replaced it. "Another theft? Who keeps doing this? And who eats peanut butter and sauerkraut? I mean this is disgusting!"

(Back to business)

We clambered into the shuttle and strapped ourselves into the seats of the main bridge. I activated the boosters and we shot out of the landing bay, through a secret tunnel, and out of a hole hidden deep in the park. In a minute, we were clear of the earth's atmosphere.

"Alright, we got a full eight hours before we reach Mars where the NMB is. In the meantime, take a tour, there are a lot of things to do on board." I told them.

"NMB?" Asked Lucy.

"Nazi Mars Base." They looked confused. "Come on. America was the first to reach the MOON. They weren't the first into space, the Nazi's were."

After a round of shock and argue, they each went their separate ways. "By the way, stay clear of the engine room. The atmospheric pressure and temperature in there is enough to turn you to dust."

Though I trusted them, I had doubt. But as I made my way to the engine room, I could see Lucy in the dark closet writing creepy space poetry, Lola and Lulu were both busy playing space princess and Leni and Lisa were stargazing. Lori, Lynn, Lana and Lily were all in the bathroom (I regret telling them that the first take off is not easy on everyone) and Lincoln was busy looking at the Particle collider that generates one of the fuels for the ship. (Somewhere an alien overlord is asking who eats peanut butter and sauerkraut sandwiches)

After the eight hours, we came into sight what would be an interconnecting systems of tubes and domes. This was the NMB, and the Nazi flag dispelled any argument from Lisa. We landed in the one of the domes which is known as the landing bay. We got off and I hastily stopped them from going anywhere. "Ok, only two rules. Don't go to the airlocks and if it looks dangerous, ask me before you use it."

No sooner than I said that, Lana came running past me into the ship carrying a slimy egg... Oh no. That was how we found ourselves on the ship flying from a mutated lizard-cow thing. So much for that day out. Though we would have had to run eventually, we all glared at Lana for stealing its egg.

"You just had to steal its egg, didn't you?" Luna scolded.

"I didn't know it would chase after us!"

"We're on a foreign planet and that egg is half the size of me. How would something not chase you for stealing it?"

I chose this time to interject. "Woah, before we kill Lana, I suggest we get rid of the egg."

A half hour later and a severe fight from the Tomboy, we ejected it (with a parachute!) back onto Mars, much to the delight of the creature.

We touched down back in Royal Woods and we then proceeded to make Lana suffer.


	5. Chapter 5

I was busy going upstairs into the living room to watch the Pacific when I was met by Lincoln and his parents, who were holding Lily, and they look like as though something terrible is happening and we need to flee for a while.

"Something terrible is happening and we need to flee for a while." Called it. "The girls are all involved in this horrendous argument and it seems like it's not going to die down soon."

"So?" I replied.

"So we are just leaving for a few days. Mr Grouse and the Santiagos will look after them until this blows over." Explained Mrs Loud.

At this I had to scoff. "Don't you think you're over-reacting?"

Suddenly Lana came up to me and asked "Can I borrow one of your lasers to blast Luna?"

And that is how I found myself in Vanzilla, my lab under complete lockdown, on my way to a camping site with four Louds.

Needless to say, the ride was absolutely horrifying; I don't even want to know what just crawled under me. But I rather not find out.

We arrived at the campsite and I immediately kissed the ground, much to the confusion of everyone else, and did a happy dance to be finally out of that death trap, causing even more confusion. I swore that I would never go back in that death-mobile as soon as we get back to my lab and I create a better vehicle.

I got a chill, and I turned and looked but no-one was there. Shrugging, I began to help set up camp.

(Katyusha's Point Of View)

Greetings Comrades! I am Katyusha, and I am a soviet. I am dressed in a red military shirt and skirt, knee high black boots with a red army winter hat that has the soviet red star. I have blonde hair and blue eyes. You may be wondering why I am here. Well you see, I am trying to KILL that Kusok der'ma named Stormtrooper. He is a complete fascist, and I plan to feed his body to my red bear Boskov.

(Later)

Right! Now is the time! All I have to do is to sneak this beehive into his tent, and shake it before fleeing. He will never know... Why is Boskov looking at me like that? Oh Blyad! I forgot he likes honey!

(Storms P.O.V)

I thought I heard a scream, and the sound of buzzing and a hungry bear. Must be a woman running from some bees she must be allergic to whilst a kind and majestic brown bear feasts on some honey from a tree. Das ist gut nature. Das ist gut.

(Katyusha's Point Of View)

I may have planned that wrong Comrades, as I am trying to flee from two creatures that want to eat the honey that is covered on me. But mark my words; I will get that Nazi lover tomorrow.

(Next day)

All right, that fascist will be begging for mercy! I have placed a sign pointing to a cave that says 'Fair Grounds'. But the reality is, that cave contains a very, very angry pack of cougars. Storm will end up like his fellow fascists when they invaded mother Russia! HAHAHA.

(Storms P.O.V)

I was busy walking in the wood, mulling over what the loud sisters could be fighting about. Possibly, they could be fighting about who is Lincoln's favourite which, personally, I think is Lulu since, you know, they share the same likes, dislikes, ideas and – is that a way to some fair grounds! Hooray! I walked in, and an hour and a half later, I walked out, souvenirs for the entire Loud family. I particularly liked the fact that the rollercoaster was themed like a dragon.

(Katyusha's Point Of View)

What the Chertov ad? I was busy doing a victory dance, when he just walked out of there. What on earth happened? Comrades, this will need some investigation. I hope I ride a rollercoaster!

(Later)

Well, I am having an adrenaline rush – from running from a wild pack of cougars! How did Storm do that? Tomorrow, I shall try for the third and final time.

(Next day)

All right! If this does not get that no-good swine, then I will admit defeat! All I did was poison his water canteen! He will suffer a slow and painful death.

(Storms P.O.V)

Man, rock climbing is harder than it looks. I grabbed my canteen and drank from it, appreciating the sweetness it brings to my parched throat. I need to ask what Lincoln what he thinks the cause of the fight is.

(Katyusha's Point Of View)

What! He should be writhing on the floor in pain! I watched him go away, before taking his canteen. I was thirsty and since that poison did not work, I figured it would be safe to drink. I took a sip – GAH URK BLEH!

(Storms P.O.V)

"... and I seriously think it's about whom is your favourite sibling." I said to Lincoln as we made our way back to the tent to pack it up.

"Uh Storm." Lincoln pointed to a girl, clad in red, which was writhing in pain and was semi conscious.

I ran over and inspected her. She was poisoned! Luckily, I learned from a martial arts movie about a secret technique to remove poison from the body. I hit her on the chest, then stomach and finally on her abdomen. She sputtered and coughed out the poison. She then sat up and looked at me, in both shock and relief.

"You saved me? After I tried to kill you?" Wait, what?

A half hour later, the girl, who I learned was Katyusha, explained that she tried to kill me because I was a Nazi. I explained to her that I was only dressed like one, but I wasn't one. I offered her a place to stay and she said yes, as long as she can bring her pet bear Boskov along. Great

An hour later, we arrived home. We took Boskov out of the back of Vanzilla and he kissed the ground. Even animals hate that monstrosity. We walked inside and saw the Loud sisters still bickering.

"What on earth are you fighting about?" I yelled, catching their attention.

Lola spoke up. "We are seeing who gets which dress to take to the fancy restaurant in town."

The next second I stared at them with unbridled rage and hatred, whilst holding a flamethrower. They looked on in horror as I torched the silk dresses. I then fled shouting "YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"


End file.
